This Thing We Call the Internet

So I haven't got on the internet since Saturday simply because my computer wasn't on and I was too lazy to turn it on. Getting on this morning I checked my email to find my inbox flooded (normally I stay on top of it and it's never bad at all), my facebook account hacked from Singapore (don't worry, facebook froze my account until I verified that I am who I am--after a very large questionaire and a password change, I'm fine), and a job interview from one of the places I applied too (good thing I can stop by today sometime, but that means I have to go back to my apartment to change into something more interview appropiate, my t-shirt and jeans that I'm wearing just won't cut it). Isn't crazy that you can disappear from the cyber world for 3 days and already I'm so behind on all of my stuff. Oh well.

On a happier note: the royal wedding is this weekend and all of my roommates are getting up at 4:30 in the morning to watch it. Doesn't that sound like fun?

Celebration!

I just got a half tuition scholarship for next year! Woot!

Because I Love Beautiful Things

I went to talk to the head costume designer today about being a costume designer. I've been thinking about changing my major lately and I've been playing around with the idea of being a costume designer. She said that chances are I would have to get a masters degree to really go far in the field, but the job is fairly marketable though doesn't pay really well. She gave me some things to do this summer in the costume shop at my university for some experience. But then she asked me a question to help in my indecisiveness: Can you imagine doing anything else?

If I love it enough I can make it work, right? I honestly can't really think of anything that would make me happier. I don't want to sit behind a desk all day, writing and editing papers, as was my original life plan. I want to go out there and create things. But I'm scared. Scared of going against what I've wanted for so long -- though I don't know if I want it anymore. Scared of putting myself and my designs out there and being shut down. Scared of the lack of stability that, if I don't play my cards right, can happen. Scared of the acting classes that I'll have to take as part of the major. Scared of doing anything else.

I'm glad for my eight month long break so I can figure my life out.

Like Loaded Guns

Because I've been a slacker on my blog lately, I'm continuing the tradition by just posting some music that I've been loving lately. Nothing much more.





(This music video is so strange but the song is so fantastic)

It's a Matter of Beauty

The Lady of Shalott, John William Waterhouse, 1888

I was studying this painting tonight as my British Lit class talked about Pre-Raphaelite poetry. I think it's pretty beautiful. The mix of the christian themes and the pagan themes, mixing of earthiness with heaven, mixing realism and legend. The bright colors and patterns, the sensuality as a rejection of Victorian prudishness. Looking back at Shakespeare, at Keats, at King Arthur, at the Bible because the painters world was filled with smoke stacks and gray horizons and the wish to avoid the realistic world though its full of realistic details. Beautiful.

The Library Can Feel Like a Dungeon

So last Saturday I was doing research and the book I needed was in Special Collections. If you've never been to Special Collections, let me tell you--it's pretty different. You fill out all of this paperwork and they lock, yes lock, you in a room with only a few scraps of paper and a pencil. I stayed there for two hours going over this book called The Dungeon of the Heart: Human Isolation and the American Novel. So there I was, by myself (everyone else was at Saturday's basketball game), locked in a room, reading a depressing book on isolationism in the bowels of the library.

Ironic, isn't it?

And the book was from the 1960's, not that old at all. I don't know why it was even in Special Collections.

Reading

Since my life is being swarmed with papers and reading assignments right now, I just thought I'd post on everything that I'm reading.





I'm also reading other various pieces from Christina Rosetti, Edgar Allen Poe, Nathaniel Hawthorne, Frederick Douglas, Ralph Waldo Emerson, Lord Alfred Tennyson, and Robert Browning.